Have Heart interview

It was a great time. It was kind of miserable waiting through the entire weekend, though. We played last - dead last. But it was fucking great. It's so awesome that I got to see all my friends that we've met over the past five years all in one place. The only complaint I had was that I was miserable waiting for our set -- I had been waiting since last year to play it. It was just the waiting and the butterflies feeling I had waiting to play. It was fucking great, though - no stupid bullshit fights or anything like that. I had a fucking awesome time.

I can't say I have a favorite. I like them both the same. I love playing to new people - we played this fest to 6000 people in Germany and it was so great because I knew only a handful of people had maybe heard us before. Even if 1000 people had heard us, we got to play to 5000 people that had never heard us before. That was a wonderful feeling. I also love playing a small show in Boston or somewhere like that - it's always a fucking great time. I definitely need a balance - I have no favorite.

We did, yeah.

We believe that you've got to take things slow. Also, a lot of bands start out with contacts and connections. When we started out, we didn't know anybody. It's easy for some bands in the Boston scene because they know the right people. We made it our purpose to never bow down to that, to kiss someone's ass to get somewhere. I would humbly like to emphasize our humble beginnings and note that the ride along the way has been so much more enjoyable for us because it came in small segments. We've been able to appreciate our hard work - maybe that's why is seems like it took so long.

It was hard, too, because we were all still in school - most of us just graduated from college. It was hard to put together long tours financially and time-wise for a while, so it maybe just took us a little bit longer than most bands.

I hate the word "image" - it's such a dirty word. With our record, we wanted to do something that we all liked. It just came out the way we wanted it. We never really set out to stand apart - we just didn't want the cover to have a bunch of random, meaningless shit on it. Nothing on that record is just a random, cool looking design. The actual image - the idea of having a tree - comes from the fact that I wrote most of the lyrics in my room back home where I grew up. I don't have this giant field in my backyard or anything, but outside my window, there's a tree, and the sun rises behind that tree. Nights when I couldn't sleep, I'd stay up writing lyrics. That was the image I'd see while writing the lyrics for the record.

And the symbolism of the tree appears in the lyrics, so it's not just random bullshit. There's meaning behind everything - the tree, the birds, the sunset, the mountains. Everything has a meaning to it.

That's a good question. Um, one tradition that I feel should be sustained and preserved and always kept in heart of the scene is the spirit of hardcore. To me, the definition of that would be to have a subculture with substance. The opposition to the mainstream and using mainstream ethics -- mainstream ideals like getting somewhere through who you know, or viewing people as consumers and dollar signs as opposed to people. It's like baseball games in Boston right now. I feel like the magic is gone.

I used to go when tickets were $10 and it was all just people who liked baseball. Now, everywhere you go, it's all these fucking people in Red Sox shit. You go there and everyone looks exactly the fucking same. It's a total marketing scheme and I think that it's taking away from the real magic. I remember when I used to go to games as a kid and it was all real Red Sox fans - it was a real dirty, "let's go Sox" type of thing. Now it's just yuppie idiots who only see the city once a year. That's a mainstream type of thing, and I hate it when hardcore reflects that - [opposition to the mainstream] is a tradition that I feel needs to be preserved.

Musically, though, if it's a progression - I mean, can we push the boundaries? I wouldn't want to stray too far off the path to the point where we're playing Techno or something like that.

[Laughs] Yeah, right. But as long as the subculture with substance is there, then I think you can push the boundaries some. I mean, realistically speaking, if you're really playing Techno or Rock or whatever, it's not going to come off as hardcore in the traditional sense. As long as you keep those ethics, though, hardcore at its heart is going to be preserved. Musically speaking, you can push the boundaries some.

Wow - that's a loaded question. Well, I wrote that song about Ray Cappo [of Shelter, Youth of Today], actually. We have another song called "To Us Fools" that I wrote when I was, like, 14 - before Have Heart was even a band. I was really bummed because I had read this interview with Ray Cappo where he said he wasn't straight edge anymore. It crushed me - I was like "fuck you!" But then I read some more interviews, and I actually got to see Youth of Today, and I think I developed a more personal definition of straight edge -- it's something for me. I realize that everyone has their own path that they have to follow, and sometimes it can be dangerous if you ignore that path if you feel and think that it's right for you. That song is really just about living your own life.

Well, when I'm talking into the mic, I like to just be real. I don't want to be an entertainer. When I'm listening to bands, that's how they get their message across to me. I mean, I understand that there are some people who like to rehearse what they say onstage - it's helps it come across more fluidly. Maybe I should do that - it'd probably help me out some. When I'm trying to get something across, though, I just like to be as real and honest as I can be - especially to younger kids. If we're playing a show and there's a shitload of really young kids acting like idiots and I get the general vibe that they don't really care about hardcore - which is something you can't always judge when you're just watching a show, by the way - but if I get that vibe, I'll talk about the reasons I fell in love with hardcore and what it's meant to my life. I'll give them examples, lots of things they can relate to.

See, I don't really see it as advertising - it's really more of an expression. There's definitely a fine line between the two, though. One thing that always pisses me off are those fucking straight edge company shirts that are trying to sell shit like "Straight Edge - It's a Lifestyle! Buy this shirt for $15!" That's fucking retarded - that's advertising a belief. I don't think you can sell your beliefs. It should be a matter of expression. I've never been opposed to anyone X-ing up at a show because, I'll admit, when I first got into straight edge when I was 11 or 12, it was something to belong to. It was something that, because I had no friends, I'll honestly admit that I saw straight edge as a group that I could belong to. I wasn't in it for life, but that's natural for an 11 or 12-year old - I got into straight edge because it looked so cool. It drew me in because it was this kind of rebellious lifestyle where I got to wear Xs on my hands and I thought it looked cool. To the 11-year old eye or the 12-year old eye or the 13-year old eye, as long it's just expression, then it's cool. If it wasn't for that cool logo or those cool two words, I wouldn't have found straight edge. To be perfectly honest, I'm the kind of person where I don't think I would have been straight edge if straight edge didn't exist. It was taught to me.

I don't have any problem with people not X-ing up. Personally, I hate washing off Xs. To be realistic, I can't walk into my job, or try to get a job, or go to school and be taken seriously with marker all over my hands. It's so annoying to scrub that shit off - I understand why people don't want to do that. I don't give a shit. Like I said before, straight edge is my path. I have a weird definition of straight edge in a personal sense. I believe that the only person to whom straight edge matters - the only person who is straight edge in this world - is me. Other people are just doing whatever they want to do. I mean, I understand that other people are straight edge, but I'll try to remind myself that I'm the only one who is straight edge. If someone doesn't want to X up, fuck it - I don't care. It's cool. I'll worry about myself.

What I always do - or try to do, anyway - is, before I ever say anything onstage, try to say "in my humble opinion" or "it is my personal belief that" - I get it out there and say that this is just what I think. And if I don't do that, I've at least written lyrics that are, in my own opinion, very open-minded and very communal. Really, I think that's the best way to get across an ideology without saying "THIS IS THE WAY!" Everyone has their own way.

I hate that word.

You know, sometimes I get really bummed out. When you go on tour, you see more and more of the hardcore scene and you sometimes get disillusioned. You see so many kids not giving a shit. And then you hear these stories about the 90s or the 80s - well, maybe more so about the 90s - that people gave more of a shit about the bands. If a touring band came through, there'd be at least 200 kids. It really bums me out. I think what has deterred a lot of people from coming to shows is the violence and the adoption of mainstream ideologies - this whole overly-rugged individualism, this whole "I stand on my own" lack of togetherness. Sometimes, I really feel like it sucks. Other times, though, when I look beneath the surface, it's different. I guess I get disillusioned sometimes because I feel like kids don't give a shit, because people have adopted this popular idea of treating each other like shit. Not that the hardcore scene is this Utopian club or anything like that - it never was, it probably never will be. It's just that at one point, it stood apart from everything else. That's why I feel like it's important to convey positive messages - focus on the good and address the bad, but not in a negative way.

Well, that's what I love about hardcore - it's aggressive music. It's pushing people to the limit, putting them right on the edge, pushing them right up against the obstacle of reacting in a violent manner. You can act violently and let yourself go, but you're really missing out on the opportunity to let out those aggressions that, in terms of your mental health, need to be released in a different way. That's why I love hardcore - it walks a tightrope that you don't really find anywhere else. There are so many things that don't challenge us in society. I feel like hardcore is such a wonderful thing because it can really push us to the limit. I feel like that's also the problem with it, though. With any shit like that, violence is going to happen. From what I'm told, [the level of] violence has definitely gone down since the 90s. Of course, so has the number of people at shows, so I don't really know.

That's fine - I'm going to be a teacher, so there's no such thing as a stupid question.

[Laughs] Well, let's see.

Didn't she rip off a song by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs?

Remember that big Yeah Yeah Yeahs song "Maps"? Yeah there's a riff. That "Since U Been Gone" song is ripping off that "Maps" song. Last I checked, I think the Yeah Yeah Yeahs were on an independent label. I just find it funny that the mainstream is constantly ripping off stuff from the subcultures. Fuck Kelly Clarkson.

You know, I've never listened to them.

Uh, no.

Oddly enough, when we were leaving Europe, our driver was dropping us off at the airport and picking up Scars of Tomorrow. As we were leaving, they were just getting to Europe. We met them and I think they were having a little feud with each other or something like that, and apparently they broke up.

Uh, yeah - "later!"

Any band? I guess there isn't a band I'd currently drive 600 miles to see - I don't have the money for that, and I know they'd eventually just come to my town and I could see them there. Hypothetically speaking, though, I'd do it to see Embrace. If they ever did a reunion, I'd see them in a heartbeat. I'd kill to see Outspoken again. I'd kill to see In My Eyes. And, um, Verse.

If they were doing a live show and it was 600 miles away, I'd drive the 600 miles. I would walk if I had to.

Of all time, or just hardcore?

I'll give you my top 5 hardcore, then I'll give you top 5 of all time. This is albums, right? Not bands? There's a difference between my top 5 hardcore records and my top 5 favorite hardcore bands.

Ok, so - Top 5 hardcore records: Youth of Today - We're Not In This Alone, Minor Threat - Out of Step, 7 Seconds - The Crew, 7 Seconds - Walk Together, Rock Together, and fifth would be a tie between Outspoken - The Current and the Embrace LP.

Ok, Top 5 Records of all time: Rage Against the Machine - Evil Empire, Hot Water Music - No Division, Archers of Loaf - Icky Mettle, Youth of Today - We're Not In This Alone, and Minor Threat - Out of Step.

Uh, my love life? Yeah, that's a good joke.

I don't know. How many?

[Laughs] Yeah - that is a good one. I know exactly what you're talking about.

I appreciate there being more women in hardcore.

Thank you.