NewsApril 1, 2010 12:25 PM ET2,961 views

Swashbuckle recording new album

Buccaneer-themed thrash band Swashbuckle is currently in the studio recording a new album, titled "Crime Always Pays." The effort is being tracked at an undisclosed location and a late-summer release via Nuclear Blast Records is expected. The group comments: "At the moment we pirates three are hard at work on recording our new album entitled 'Crime Always Pays.' That's right jerks, the thrash band with a pirate problem is back in action crafting malicious metal jams with tales of piratical shenannigans. It's gonna be a heavy record, so expect to beat the shit out of your siblings and parental units whilst ye get caught in a mosh. Expect some video-updates as we progress on our studio-adventures of musical-retardation, and while you're at it, catch us on the road in May with Hypocrisy. It'll be a killer time. Some of the new song titles we got rollin' with are: 'This Rounds On You!', 'Raw-Doggin' At the Rawbar', and 'You Bring the Cannons, We'll Bring the Balls.' Aye, I know what you be thinkin', this seems like a whole 'lotta hooplah, but let me assure you...heh, it says ass....uh, where was I. Oh yeah, let me assure you that it'll thrash your fucking brains into your butthole. Yep. I stand by that, Brain-Thrashed Buttholes."

18 comments

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LoydChristmas 4/1/2010 9:35:44 AM

Garrr steve

sofakingcool 4/1/2010 10:04:19 AM

so stoked for this....APRIL FOOLZ

hatredoftheliving 4/1/2010 10:32:33 AM

Best press release in a long time. Not really into the band, but they've got a good sense of humor about what they're doing.

Crunk_Bank 4/1/2010 10:32:36 AM

At this point, I wouldn't even be surprised if this were real.

GorillaTriscuits 4/1/2010 10:48:49 AM

This just in - Johnny Depp is making a guest appearance on the record!

Chris_Of_Tyrants 4/1/2010 10:53:21 AM

Gotta give them credit for the title You Bring the Cannons, We'll Bring the Balls.. Shoulda been the album title imo..

Flamboyant_Cowboy 4/1/2010 11:54:06 AM

Highly unfunny.

everybandsuckslol 4/1/2010 1:11:16 PM

yarggg. this music sucks.

mummifiedcircuitry 4/1/2010 1:15:02 PM

Buccaneer-themed thrash band

cokietheclown 4/1/2010 1:24:14 PM

Aye there be termites in me leg.

liferuinerjailbait 4/1/2010 3:26:32 PM

awesome dudes.

philadelphia_breadsmasher 4/1/2010 3:34:11 PM

this band sounds like a shitty 90's grunge band

hall_of_wax 4/1/2010 4:39:58 PM

Buccaneer-themed thrash band. Welcome to America.

rickitycrickit 4/1/2010 9:55:22 PM

who do they think they are, senses fail?

DUMP_UM 4/2/2010 5:02:51 AM

Bringing scurvy back. You know what to do!

IHatePubes 4/2/2010 8:38:45 AM

scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core scurvy-core!!!

stevebazzano777 4/3/2010 9:29:52 PM

pirates are not stoked

nephilimpoop 4/6/2010 3:28:50 AM

Pirate Ship Flip




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