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All Parallels You Won't Feel A Thing

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1. Marrow 2. Load A Gun And Kill Me 3. Hex 4. Nymphomaniac 5. That'll Never Be Me
2002 self-released
Our score 6

by Amy Sciarretto
4/7/2003

Massachusetts is a hotbed for extreme music, and while All Parallels hails from that geographical region, this three piece has more in common with Weezer. American Hi Fi, and Jimmy Eat World than with Converge or Diecast. "You Won't Feel A Thing" operates on a sugar high. It's bouncy, addictively melodic rock that you normally hear pounding ad nauseum on the local alternative and rock radio station. While that's not my music of choice or my preferred medium to find new music, it's certainly a feather in All Parellels' cap. It's not a crime to write a radio-friendly song and to write it well. "You Won't Feel A Thing" is an EP that knows how to rock the three power chords to the fullest extent of the law and how to write a kitschy song with tongue-in-cheek lyrics. In fact, the lyrics come across as first-hand and vividly personal, and are often the most intriguing, entertaining thing about "You Won't Feel A Thing." Take the American culture references in "Nymphomaniac." Here, vocalist/bassist Larry Chiswick sings "Whips, chains, dirty names / Please pass the Tylenol / She turned a hotel into a jail cell / Trojans on the nightstand / Bible in my / I can't keep fucking her." What a clear picture! And a funny one at that. It's refreshing to listen someone sing something so specific and visual. "You Won't Feel A Thing" is a quick listen. You get in and out with relative ease, and you'll totally have fun with it, without ever asking "Please God, make it stop!" This is fifteen minutes of your life that we can guarantee you won't ask to have returned when "That'll Never Be Me" trails off. The songs are hooky enough to take a residency in your brain long after the CD is over. I am still quite surprised at how crisp and clear the CD sounds. Bottom Line: Someone call major label A&R reps! All Parallels knows how to write radio fare (notice we didn't say "fodder") and we're pretty sure the band hasn't tapped into the fullest potential with this little EP here. Whether you consider the stuff Weezer doles out as an airwave pollutant or pleasure depends on personal taste. It's rather good for what it is, without rewriting the rock cannon. In all honesty, "You Won't Feel A Thing" isn't tapping into the darkest recesses of the adolescent male heart a la Dashboard Confessional, but "Load A Gun And Kill Me" is much more stomachable than most of the crapola on the FM dial, with the exception of college radio, of course.

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