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The following blog is solely the work of Mr. Lambgoat himself. Nothing of consequence is likely to occur here, other than the innermost thoughts of an extremely ____ individual.

Pat Robertson advocates for hitting children over their music choices

Earlier this week, televangelist, author, and one-time presidential candidate Pat Robertson advised the mother of an 11 year-old boy to "smack" the child for listening to "evil" music.

The woman had written Robertson to express concern for her son, who "recently started listening to music that speaks of the 'beast within' and the 'infection in people'." She didn't mention the genre of the music per se, but it sure seems likely that the poor child is listening to metal.

Robertson said, "it doesn't hurt to smack a little 11 year old around a little bit and say, 'You behave, you're not going to listen to that garbage in my house."

You can watch the video below.

Metallica guitarist Kirk Hammett made an appearance during Meshuggah's set yesterday amidst Hammet's Fear FestEvil at RockBar Theater in San Jose, California.

Hammet joined the Swedish metallers to play a guitar solo during the band's song, "Bleed." Fan-filmed footage of Hammett and Meshuggah together can be viewed below.

cross drama with Vital Remains

Several days ago Rhode Island death metallers Vital Remains were performing at the Haven in Orlando, Florida when frontman Brian Werner (he with healing ribs) noticed a cross hanging above the stage. Werner had the cross taken down, at which point the owner of the club told him "not to touch my cross" and took the stage to reclaim it. Werner responded that he didn't want the cross on stage while they sang songs about Satan, before launching into a tirade against Jesus. You can watch the strange, albeit amusing, incident below.

earnings and attendance Trash Talk

Some new earnings and attendance data has been released via Boxscore. This week, the data includes shows from Slayer, Pierce The Veil, Mastodon, Machine Head, Helmet, and Trash Talk.

Artist/Event Venue City/State Event Dates Gross Sales Attend/
Slayer, Exodus, Suicidal Tendencies The Forum Inglewood, Calif. Nov. 14, 2014 $328,909 7,074 /
$49.50, $39.50
Alice Cooper Ruth Eckerd Hall Clearwater, Fla. Feb. 16, 2015 $112,506 2,028 /
$68.25, $41.25
Pierce The Veil & Sleeping With Sirens, Pvris, Mallory Knox Myth St. Paul, Minn. Feb. 4, 2015 $75,640 2,529 /
$35, $29.50
Black Label Society, Hatebreed, Butcher Babies Royal Oak Music Theatre Royal Oak, Mich. Jan. 16, 2015 $49,883 1,800 /
$35, $27.50
Mastodon Teatro Estudio Cavaret Guadalajara, Mexico March 13, 2015 $19,157 1,221 /
Machine Head The Crofoot Pontiac, Mich. Feb. 9, 2015 $15,740 608 /
$30, $25
Hellyeah, Devour the Day, Like a Storm Rams Head Live! Baltimore, Md. March 3, 2015 $14,407 646 /
$25, $22
Helmet High Noon Saloon Madison, Wis. March 12, 2015 $6,800 400 /
Trash Talk, Ratking, Lee Bannon The Independent San Francisco, Calif. March 17, 2015 $3,660 244 /
Pallbearer, Solstafire, Mortals Triple Rock Social Club Minneapolis, Minn. Dec. 17, 2014 $3,366 270 /
$14, $12
Jonny Craig, Kyle Lucas Triple Rock Social Club Minneapolis, Minn. Feb. 8, 2015 $2,568 166 /
$17, $15

Interestingly, someone sent this link to Trash Talk frontman Lee Spielman and you can see his explanation for their show turnout below.

It's Monday and there's not a whole lot going on in the metal world, so why not share a new video from Jared Dines? Bass players are easy targets, and Dines has a go at them below.

Every time he puts out a new video, I say, "I'm not going to post about another Dines video," but then I do. Basically, if he uploads something that makes me laugh out loud at least once, I'll share it (the "didn't learn the choreography" part is what did it for me).

fight at Street Dogs show

A Tuesday night Street Dogs show at the House of Blues in Anaheim, CA erupted into a brawl between members of the band, audience, and a group of alleged neo-Nazis. According to the band, while performing, they "noticed a group of Neo nazis rough housing and intimidating our fans and throwing up sieg heil salutes in the air." Lenny Lashley, guitarist of the Boston punk band, then jumped into the pit and a melee ensued.

Order was eventually restored and security ejected the troublemakers. The show then continued without incident. Video footage of the fracas can be seen below.

Meanwhile, Street Dogs' Mike McColgan issued the following statement:

"At this time I would like to officially address what happened in Anaheim. Last night at our show in Anaheim at the House Of Blues while we were playing our song Final Transmission for a dear departed fan and friend of ours USMC Jordan Stanton we noticed a group of Neo nazis rough housing and intimidating our fans and throwing up sieg heil salutes in the air. Their very presence, their hateful,bigoted and ignorant ideology is odious to us and completely unacceptable. We with fans, friends and the assistance of security removed them from the crowd and in the process of mitigating them out some of us sustained superficial injuries. We can attribute those injuries only being superficial in nature to the House Of Blues and their exceptional staff, our fans and our friends. After they were removed we continued with our show and finished the show without incident. In closing we submit this: no neo nazis are allowed at our shows. We have always believed in equality and that all people are created equal. We will not suffer or tolerate bigotry in any manifestation. PERIOD!!!!"

Last year, Jimmy Kimmel Live went to South By Southwest in Austin, Texas to ask hipsters about bands that don't actually exist. It was pretty funny. Fast forward to SXSW 2015, and the show returned to Austin to confront a whole new crop of unsuspecting liars. Have a look below.

14th fret capo metal

3/16/2015 10:20:46 AM PT   comments [4]
We're generally more than happy to share musician and YouTube'r Rob Scallon's forays into metal experimentation. Recently he's been tuning down, so Mr. Scallon has decided tune up for a change via a capo on the 14th fret of his guitar. Up Tuning, commence:

Cronos and Henry Rollins

In his 1994 memoir, Get In The Van, Henry Rollins had some rather unflattering things to say about British metal band Venom. Recalling a 1986 show in which Rollins' band Black Flag opened for Venom, Rollins had the following to say:

"Venom took almost an hour to get onstage. They had roadies tuning their guitars and shit. Finally, they hit stage. They were hilarious. It was like seeing Spinal Tap. The drummer had a guy that held an electric fan next to him and kept him high and dry. The singer/bass player was named Kronos [sic]. He had some great raps. He got the crowd to chant what I thought was 'Black Funky Metal' over and over, which I thought was pretty cool and then I thought that maybe I was wrong about these guys. I found out later that it was 'Black Fucking Metal.' Oh, excuse me. I expected them to go into [the Spinal Tap song] 'Sex Farm Woman' at any second. The guitar player was so bad it was painful. I had a great time. The bass player was hilarious. He would wiggle his tongue and roll his eyes. But he also would fix his hair every fifteen seconds or so...

"After an hour of 'I can't fucking hear you!' they said, 'Good fucking night, New fucking Jersey!' and ran for the dressing room.

"Venom is weak. Everything about them is weak. They can't even play. They had a bunch of roadies to do everything. Weak, weak, weak. I would love to play with fucking 'heavy metal' bands more often. It was fun crushing them. It's all lights and makeup. What bullshit. Venom suck. They are so full of shit. What a bad joke. They don't sweat and they probably don't even fuck."

Wow, I wonder how Henry Rollins feels about Venom? Anyway, fast forward 20+ years later and Venom frontman Conrad "Cronos" Lant has finally retaliated. In a new interview with Mitch Lafon of the "One On One With Mitch Lafon" podcast, Cronos responded to Rollins' remarks:

"Let me tell you the truth about that concert. Henry Rollins's mom phoned us up and told us that they were the next big thing in New York and that they had such a huge following, blah blah blah blah blah. Little did we know that they were a fucking sad little band that had no following.

"When we got there, they were just like fucking chidren; they couldn't play, they had no fucking instruments, we had to lend those guys the backline. They arrived at the show with their fucking little care package with their sandwiches in it and a bottle of orange juice. It was, like, 'I thought you guys were in a band. I thought you were musicians.' And they just cried about everything. We couldn't stop laughing at them. But for those guys to arrive at the show with their mom, and their mom's, like, sort of, like, telling everybody what to do. And she gets into an argument with our manager. And our manager just told her to fuck right off. She was, like, 'We were promised a dressing room.' And it's, like, 'Yeah. There's the room in there.' There's, like, three chairs in it. We don't own the venue. We just turn up. We're not interested in the backstage; we're interested in the stage. We're here to play a concert. Behind the stage, there are some rooms. There's a toilet in one of them and a chair and a table. That's your backstage. This is the reality of rock and roll. It's the backstage. Ah, she cried her fucking eyes out.

"But those guys were such fucking children. And for all of this about how he stood and watched the VENOM show and couldn't laughing with his friends. As soon as they had finished playing, they got in their [van] and left. So I don't know what show he watched, but it certainly wasn't the VENOM show. And also, if you read the book, he got the date wrong of the gig. [Laughs]

"This is why Henry Rollins writes books and is no longer in a band. Because he's not a fucking musician; he's a fool."

Suicide Silence and B-Real in the Smokebox

Caution, you might get stoned just from watching this video.

In the newest episode of "The Smokebox" on BREALTV, Suicide Silence frontman Eddie Hermida and guitarist Mark Helymun sit down with Cypress Hill member B-Real (aka Dr. Greenthumb) to smoke herb, talk music, touring, and cannabis. You can check it out below.

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